mildly amusing post from one of my hunting forums:
Somali Cruise Package
I was checking cruise lines because I heard the rates are
very cheap right now. I found a Somali cruise package that departs from
Sawakin (in the Sudan ) and docks at Bagamoya (in Tanzania ).
The cost is a bit high @ 800 per person double occupancy but I didn't
find that offensive. What I found encouraging and enlightened is that
the cruise is encouraging people to bring their 'High powered weapons'
along on the cruise. If you don't have your own weapons you can rent
them right there on the boat. They claim to have a master gunsmith on
board and will have reloading parties every afternoon as well as
optional marksmanship training. The cruise lasts from 4-8 days and
nights and costs a maximum of $3200 per person double occupancy (4
days). All the boat does is sail up and down the coast of Somalia
waiting to get hijacked by pirates. Here are some of the costs and
claims associated with the package.
$800.00 US/per day double occupancy (4 day max billing)
M-16 full auto rental $25.00/day ammo at 100 rounds of 5.56 armor piercing ammo at 15.95
Ak-47 riffle @ No charge. ammo at 100 rounds of 7.62 com block ball ammo at 14.95
Barrett M-107 .50 cal sniper riffle rental 55.00/day ammo at 25
rounds 50 cal armor piercing at $9.95
Crew members can double as spotters for $30.00 per hour (spotting
scope included).
Wow - they even offer RPG's at 75 bucks and 200 dollars for 3
standard loads.
"Everyone gets use of free complimentary night vision equipment
and coffee and snacks on the top deck from 7pm-6am."
Meals are not included but costs seem reasonable.
Most cruises offer a mini-bar... these gung ho entrepreneurs
offer......... get this.....
"MOUNTED MINIGUN AVAILABLE @ 450.00 per 30 seconds of sustained
fire" (Sign me up for that!) They advertise group rates and corporate discounts......and even claim
"FUN FOR THE WHOLE FAMILY"
They even have a partial money back offer if not satisfied....here's
some text from the ad.
"We guarantee that you will experience at least two hijacking attempts
by pirates or we will refund half your money back including gun rental
charges and any unused ammo (mini-gun charges not included).
How can we guarantee you will experience a hijacking?
We operate at 5 knots within 12 miles of the coast of Somalia ..
If an attempted Hijacking does not occur we will turn the boat around and cruise by at 4 knots. We will
repeat this for up to 8 days making three passes a day along the entire
length of Somalia . At night the boat is fully lit and bottle rockets
are shot off at intervals and loud disco music beamed shore side to
attract attention. Cabin space is limited so respond quickly. Reserve
your package before the end of May and get 100 rounds of free tracer
ammo in the caliber of your choice."
As if all that isn't enough to whet your appetite, there were a few testimonials.
"I got three confirmed kills on my last trip. I'll never hunt
big game in Africa again. I felt like the Komandant in Schindlers list!"---- Lars , Hamburg , Germany
"Six attacks in 4 days were more than I expected. I bagged three
pirates and my 12yr old son sank two rowboats with the mini-gun.
PIRATES 0 - PASSENGERS-32! Well worth the trip. Just make sure your
spotter speaks English" - Ned, Salt Lake city , Utah USA
"Like ducks in a barrel. This is must do! - Zeke, Minnahaw Springs , Kentucky , USA
