One Day at a Time - Do You Know Bill W?

[cowherder]

Sorry for the news, t&p

[Monty]

Yes, very sad news, thoughts and prayers sent.

[seamonkey]

Thoughts and prayers. May God watch over her.

[DarkSkies]

Still praying for her, Jon, please keep us updated....



*********

Live for Today....
this is a variation of an old Sanskrit Proverb I think is somewhere in this thread as well....


Seizing the Moment
(from ITR daily mails)


I will not hold back today. I will seize the moment. All the excitement and beauty of life is just as present in it as is or ever will be possible. There is nowhere else to be. This is it. The potential for life is here and now; there is not nor could there be another, more important or soul-filled moment.

[jonthepain]

Thanks everybody.

Mom was released yesterday. I had to go back to work, so my wife has taken my place with Mom. She'll give her a hand for a few days, and we'll see if she can live on her own again. If not, she'll go to the next level up of assisted living.

The first stroke was in the back of the brain, the part that controls vision, so she is now legally blind. She has limited, blurry pinhole vision in one eye; the other is completely blind. The second stroke was in the left front of the brain, which controls speech. She has been able to get a lot of that back.

Mom is quite a character. Her mom died when she was 8; her dad lost everything in the great depression (Mom was born in 1920,) and my dad died suddenly in 1985 at the age of 67. They were married in 1942 the day before Dad shipped out to Pearl, where he spent the war as a codebreaker. She managed to conceive on their wedding night, but lost the baby.

The list of stuff goes on and on, but she has a great sense of humor and is a tough old bird.

When she was on the edge a week ago, she told me, "sh_t happens." We sure are glad that she survived.

Thanks again for all your prayers.

Yours,
Jon

[DarkSkies]

from the Daily Readings....






September 6

Honest Living




Soul cannot shine through a distorted lens; it cannot operate through a dishonest life, a life filled with pretense and subtle lies. I will be honest and genuine in the way I live. I won't pretend to be what I am not in order to look good. Living well requires a constant vigilance, constant awareness. When I don't pay attention to the way I live, it is all too easy to slip into bad habits and nonproductive ways of thinking, behaving and conducting myself. I will live mindfully today. I live an honest life.

IF.............




If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting, too,

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream - and not makes dreams your master,

If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same.



Rudyard Kipling

http://www.google.com/evercookie/cac...ooms.com/itrbc

[DarkSkies]

Mom is quite a character. Her mom died when she was 8; her dad lost everything in the great depression (Mom was born in 1920,) and my dad died suddenly in 1985 at the age of 67. They were married in 1942 the day before Dad shipped out to Pearl, where he spent the war as a codebreaker. She managed to conceive on their wedding night, but lost the baby.

The list of stuff goes on and on, but she has a great sense of humor and is a tough old bird.

When she was on the edge a week ago, she told me, "sh_t happens." We sure are glad that she survived.

Thanks again for all your prayers.

Yours,
Jon

Interesting story, Jon..I don't remember hearing that from you before......

I like her outlook on life, because sh*t certainly does happen....
Keeping her in our prayers....

[jonthepain]

yes it certainly does.

[DarkSkies]

She's still in our prayers, Jon...



*********
I'm posting this because sometimes we take all the great things (and people) out there, for granted...I know I'm guilty of this as well...




From the ITR site...


How Amazing Is This World


How fantastic it is to imagine a creator, a force behind this wondrous mystery of life. Could it really be possible? Could life and death still be life? Am I just another aspect of the cycle of life, of soul? Who is this power that creates such beauty? This mystery is beyond my powers of contemplation. It humbles me, it puts me into perspective, it makes everything else seem so much smaller. Life. Where do I begin to wonder about it? Is accepting the mystery enough or do I need to solve it in order to enjoy it? Perhaps I am only meant to accept and live with the mystery in order to participate, to stand in awe before that which I can probably never fully understand. Today, at least, that will have to do. Today my jaw will drop.

What had that flower to do with being white,
The wayside blue and innocent heal-all?
What brought the kindred spider to that height,
Then steered the white moth thither in the night?
What but design of darkness to appall? -
If design govern in a thing so small
Robert Frost

[jonthepain]

Who has woe? who has sorrow? who has contentions? who has babbling? who has wounds without cause? who has redness of eyes?
They that tarry long at the wine; they that go to seek mixed wine.

- Solomon

(Proverbs 23:29,30)

yup, that was me.

[jonthepain]

Wine [is] a mocker, strong drink [is] raging: and whosoever is deceived thereby is not wise.

-Solomon

(Proverbs 20:1)

yeah, i knew getting drunk was a dumb thing to do. guess it took a while (ok, like 30 years of being drunk constantly) for it to sink in.

[jonthepain]

Yea, you shall be as he that lies down in the midst of the sea, or as he that lies upon the top of a mast. prov 23:34

rofl this one always cracked me up. don't know why bedspins are funny, but they are

[DarkSkies]

Jon, Great to see you here! Keep coming back!

Dark, There is a lot of disagreement over various aspects of a twelve step program. I was lucky; I was sick enough and desperate enough to follow advice. It saved my life. We come from different angles on the God aspect of the program. Acknowledging that and putting it aside, agreeing to disagree if you will, there is still a lot I can learn from you. How can I not respect a man who carries a googan bucket with such confidence and dignity?

BE the bucket

And you see from this thread that everything in fishing and sobriety, eventually refers back to the bucket.......

[DarkSkies]

This is for jonthepain........

thanks, guys. but it's all grace. no way could it be me.

Pray for Grace......time to start posting in this thread again.....




Lyrics....Pray for Grace...Michael Fanti and Spearhead

Why must I feel like this today
I'm a soldier but afraid sometimes
To face the things that may
Block the sun from shinin' rays
And fill my life with shades of grey
But still I long to find a way
So today I pray for grace

I take a moment to myself


So I can myself
To feel myself
And be real myself
Life's addictions and afflictions
Cause abrasions from their friction
Sometimes, it's easier to live in fiction
I can run, but I can't hide
From the pains that
Reside deep down inside
There is no pill
That can be swallowed
There is no guru
That can be followed
There's no escapin'
From my own history
Those that I hurt,

And those that hurt me
I was dead for a million years
'Fore I was born and
I'll be dead for a million more
After I'm gone

So I live, to give somethin'
That can live on
Like the way you hum a song when the music's gone
Like the warmth on the sand

When the sun goes down
And I'm sittin' with myself
Nobody else is around but,

(chorus)

Been a long, long time
Since I been away
Been a long, long time
Since I felt this way
Been a long, long time

I found the words to say
How much I'm grateful
For my life today
'Cause under every cup
You might find a nut
Behind every corner
You might get jacked up

At the end of every rainbow,
You might find gold
The last bite of your sandwich,
Hope you don't find mould

'Cause none of us
Can live the perfect life
The kind that we see on nick at night
And sometimes, we all
Just lose sight

Of the pain that will guide us
From dark into the light
We fall down yes, but we get up,

And sometimes we just need
A little bit of love
To help make it
Through another day
Into the night, into the light,
Into a Saturday

So in the morning when I'm waitin'
For the sun to raise
And my head's a little foggy
Like I'm in a haze
I remind myself that
Everything is gonna be okay
I take a breath, slow down and say....

[jonthepain]

well said.

[DarkSkies]

Serenity Prayer...
God grant me the Serenity to Accept the things I cannot change.
Strength to Change the things I can.

And the Wisdom, to know the Difference....



Change.... from the ITR daily feed....
"I cannot change without thinking.
This saying makes you ponder. It is a thought that challenges us to think outside of the box. It forces us into explanation. You cannot really change something without first understanding what it is you want to change. "









***********
Change, and our everyday lives.....
Many of us complain about the monotony of an everyday, boring life....we allow ourselves at times to get into a rut....
This can happen with work, family, relationships with friends, even the recreational activities we like...if we do things the same way each time, it is easy to think..."Hey, I'm bored here, is that all there is to life?"

For addicts and alcoholics, routine is good.
In our addictions, we had many bad habits. Some not related to drinking or drugs, but related to behavior.
Breaking the cycle of alcoholism/addiction involves removing alcohol and drugs.

It also involves identifying those bad habits and moving forward to break them...

I think these words may also apply not only to those struggling with addiction, but with life as well.....
The routine that many of us complain about..yes it can get boring, and mundane.....
In a way, humans are creatures of habit...some of us grow to accept and embrace the routine...because it provides us a sense of comfortability....
I understand that....the comfortability of knowing you have a job, or a home, or people who love you, in your circle of the world, is very powerful.....

It can also act as a buffer from the terrible things going on at times in the outside world.

However, there are times in life when we need to change, for ourselves....to make the move to the next level...whether it be emotionally, professionally, financially, or just giving ourselves more opportunities to find the things that make us really happy....

I'm kind of in that situation right now....
Stuck in the comfortability of the past...
Slowly pushing myself to take on different challenges and opportunities....
At times it is daunting....I honestly don't want to do it...

As much as I am hungry for other opportunities, and say I want a better life for myself...I still have the character defect of procrastination...and hanging on to the comfortability of the past......

There are times in life when you have to recognize that the reality you are in today...is not your future...
If you are depressed or feeling down, there is almost always a better way, if you are willing to plan, and work your plan....
The passage from ITR above kind of touches on that...and hence the reason for my thoughts today...

[DarkSkies]

If anyone else is feeling that way, or has felt that way...don't despair...

The only final chapter in life is death....if you recognize and accept that, you know that every day you can write a new chapter....
Today, you can change your life....

As I change my life and some of the bad habits I've fallen into, I'll try to talk about it here....
I know others get a lot out of these posts.

I stopped posting so much in this thread because I didn't think it was making a difference...but then all of a sudden I started getting PMs of encouragement...finally understanding that even though this thread helps me at times, it also helps others, who would prefer to remain anonymous....


That's ok...you can always comment if you feel like it....no stigmas are attached to posting in this thread.....
This thread is as much about life, and our struggles with it, as it is about alcoholism and addiction....
If my words have been an inspiration to some, as evidenced by the PMs, I thank you for the kind words you have sent....

And just remember, in your darkest hours, you are not alone.
If you can manage to reach out to others...some will heed the call....and tomorrow can be a better day......

[DarkSkies]

Mom is quite a character. Her mom died when she was 8; her dad lost everything in the great depression (Mom was born in 1920,) and my dad died suddenly in 1985 at the age of 67. They were married in 1942 the day before Dad shipped out to Pearl, where he spent the war as a codebreaker. She managed to conceive on their wedding night, but lost the baby.

The list of stuff goes on and on, but she has a great sense of humor and is a tough old bird.

When she was on the edge a week ago, she told me, "sh_t happens." We sure are glad that she survived.

Thanks again for all your prayers.

Yours,
Jon

I enjoy hearing about your Mom, Jon. Your family started with nothing...and was able to find some success in the landscape of opportunity in this great country....
The color you add to the posts by your characterizations is part of it....it's all real, and could be the story of any one of us....thanks as always for sharing.

[jonthepain]

you're welcome.

went to the funeral of a good friend of mine last week. he sat next to me in Bible study, and in the one-step program the he went to every week, and I attended sporadically.

heckuva nice guy, just retired from the State Highway Patrol.

59 years old. too young.

Mike Williams. goodbye, my brother. Godspeed.

[DarkSkies]

^^ I'm sorry Jon I just saw this....My deepest condolences on the loss of your friend.....
I'll call you this week...so sorry to hear that.....



RIP Mike Williams......