Jokes about sex and dirty jokes

[DarkSkies]

Sent in by surfstix, thanks!


For his birthday, little Joseph asked for a 10-speed bicycle. His father said, 'Son, we'd give you one, but the mortgage on this house is $280,000 and your mother just lost her job. There's no way we can afford it.' The next day the father saw little Joseph heading out the front door with a suitcase. So he asked, 'Son, where are you going?' Little Joseph told him; 'I was walking past your room last night and heard you telling mom you were pulling out.Then I heard her tell you to wait because she was coming too.

And I'll be damned if I'm staying here by myself with a $280,000 mortgage and no bike!

[DarkSkies]

Sent in by Fin, thanks!

Folks! If we don't laugh, we'll probably cry. So LAUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





Cartoons for those growing older.

Growing old...cartoons
« on: Jan 26th, 2007, 11:40pm » Quote Modify

[DarkSkies]

Sent in by OGB, thanks!



Subject: FW: For Your Education: Sinusoidal vs. Harmonic Motion

NO MATTER HOW OLD YOU GET, YOU NEVER LOSE INTEREST IN PHYSICS!

ENGINEERING REVIEW
Can you distinguish
Sinusoidal from
Harmonic Motion?

This is a quick physics refresher for all my engineer
friends. This information should be passed on to
non-engineers who may wonder about these important
issues.

For Engineers:








For non-Engineers:


This is Sinusoidal Motion







this is Harmonic Motion






this is a classic combination of
Sinusoidal & Harmonic Motion






I thought you should
Keep abreast of these
classic mathematical and engineering problems.

[storminsteve]

Someone sent me that one too, Dark. I tried to download the gifs for you but couldn't do it from my e-mail to here. Those jigglies are much better as gifs, imo.
We should start every day with jigglies like that.

[DarkSkies]

Sent in by Surfstix, thanks!


A beautiful young blonde New York woman named Missy was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean.



But just before she could throw herself from the docks, a handsome young man stopped her "You have so much to live for," said the man. "Look, I'm a sailor, and we're off to Europe tomorrow, and I can stow you away on my ship. "I'll take care of you, bring you food every day, and keep you happy."

With nothing to lose, combined with the fact that she had always wanted to go to Europe , Missy accepted.

That night the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a lifeboat. From then on, every night he would bring her three sandwiches and make love to her until dawn.

Three weeks later she was discovered by the captain during a routine inspection.

"What are you doing here?" asked the captain.

"I have an arrangement with one of the sailors," Missy replied. "He brings food and I get a free trip to Europe ."

"I see," the captain says.

"Plus," (wanting to make a full confession, she adds) "He's screwing me."

"He certainly is," replied the captain. "This is the Staten Island Ferry."

[bluesdude71]

This is gross, you have been warned -


4 golf buddies set out for a friendly afternoon of golf.

1 of the guys slices it, and loses his ball in the woods. He's in there for 5 minutes and the other guys get worried, so they send one of the party in to look for him.

20 minutes go by, and neither guy has come out of the woods yet. The other 2 go in there to look for them.

They find the one guy standing up, giving anal sex to the other guy. They say: "What the heck are you guys doing?"

The response:
"Well I came in here to find Pete, and he was having trouble breathing. I revived him!"

The guys ask:
That's not how you're supposed to revive him, you're supposed to give mouth to mouth!

The response:
"Well I tried that, and this is how we ended up!"

[VSdreams]

^ You're right, that is absolutely disgusting!
Not that I'm anti-gay or anything like that. But I prefer that gays keep it in the closet. We don't have to see or hear things like that, it makes you want to puke!