The Cancer thread: Cancer, early warning signs, and detection

[Shaky]

From a patients perspective, I'm not dead yet, stop acting like you're at a funeral or a wake. If I need help and you're a good friend I'll probably ask for it. Don't feed me some bs like "if I need anything call" if you don't mean it. As I said before i always hated hearing the words "sorry to hear that".

That's the first thing I usually say when I know someone is in trouble. Thanks for straightening those issues out. I would never have known that.

Look, I march to a slightly different beat. Some people like being stroked and coddled. I'm not one of them. I let my sister in law cook for me while i was getting my treatments. All her kids were away at school so i think it did her more good than it did me. She needed someone to take care of and staying with them was convenient for me as the clinics were right around the corner. Six weeks of that and we got to know each other a little better. just kidding

My mother wanted to help. I stayed with her a week and went nuts. She meant well, but she doesn't understand the meaning of the word no. No, I'm not hungry. No I don't want any more food. Please don't hover over me, etc. I don't want to sound like an ingrate, but i just can't handle the constant attention.

As far as the help, i've been let down in the past. I seldom ask anyone for help, so if you tell me you'll be there, don't be shining me on. A few acquaintances offered help, I called on one or two and they were there when i needed them.

As far as the "sorry to hear that" I suppose it's the right thing to say, but it just bugs the hell out of me

[Doublerunner]

Thank you for the advice Shaky. That really helps. God bless you

[DarkSkies]

Post #35 in the Angler/Story of the month thread.
http://stripersandanglers.com/Forum/...-Contest/page4

I thought this thead could use some humor, don't think Shaky will mind.

Spring of 1987 saw us setting our gear off the coast of Florida for swordfish. We were hauling back our third set if I remember correctly and we were having a pretty decent trip. Had about three thousand pounds in the hole for the first two sets and the third looked promising as well.

Captain was bringing in a live fish and Jay, the butcher, was waiting with the gaff. He gaffed the fish cleanly and I reached over the side and stuck the meat hook in the eye socket and gained control of the fish by grabbing his bill with my left hand. Looked to be a nice fat double.

We started hauling the fish over the side when we got broadsided by a good sized wave. The boat shook and heeled over. I lost my footing and as i started to head over the railing i let go of the fish’s bill and grabbed for the railing to keep myself from going over the side.

I had a handle on the fish as the meat hook was still stuck in his eye and in hindsight this was a huge mistake. What happened next took only a split second, but seemed like an eternity, as i grabbed the railing the fish thrashed and caught me in the belly slashing upwards. I pushed myself away and I let go of the meat hook. I looked down only to see a huge gash in my belly.

I grabbed my insides and hit the deck, the rest is a blur as I went into shock. Jay put out a mayday over the radio and John the skipper, an ex Viet Nam combat vet and medic tended to my wound. Lucky for me John was a universal blood donor and he set up make shift IV as I was losing a lot of blood. Doctors say he probably saved my life.

I was airlifted of the boat and hospitalized for a few weeks as a result of infection, nasty critters those swordfish are and the injury put an abrupt end to my longlining. I try to forget about it but the scar is a constant reminder of the dangers at sea.

Even though he embellished, (he PMed me when he wrote it and told me the truth). I think it's a great story anyway.

[rip316]

Cardoc and I will be getting the Nicoderm patch to help aid in quitting. That is how I quit last time. Smoked for 15 years, used the patch and I quit like nothing. No edginess, no withdrawls. Worked wonders. About 6 monthe ago I had some stuff going on and got really stressed out after about 8 years of quitting and I started again. I will be qutting really soon as in like this weekend. Thanks for the support.

[Shaky]

Thank you for the advice Shaky. That really helps. God bless you

You really just want to treat people the way you'd like to be treated. If you've never been really sick it can be tough to figure out. I think people tend to internalize when they get cancer because they don't wanted to be treated any differently. Just a little understanding or compassion on the bad days can go a long way. If i felt like crap I pretty much made myself inaccessible to people, usually slept it off. The rest of the time I was cool and if I was just down in the dumps I welcomed calls from friends, so long as the didn't get all sappy on me.

It's kind of like raising kids I suppose. My mom mentioned to me a few months back that one of my aunts never could understand why i didn't warm up to her. I said that's easy to answer. I didn't like being smooshed, you know, when adults grab two handfuls of cheeks and twist and utter nonsense like "my Stevie moo" . Hell i didn't like being touched all that much to begin with and Iliked being mauled even less. Nobody could possibly like that and if as an adult you thought back to your childhood, you probably wouldn't do stuff like that if you wanted to endear yourself to said child. Same goes for patients.

What does it mean. If I'm lying in a hospital bed hooked up to IVs, drain tubes and monitors, don't come over and try petting or stroking me, I'm liable to bite your damn hand off Just pretend all that stuff isn't there.

[DarkSkies]

What does it mean. If I'm lying in a hospital bed hooked up to IVs, drain tubes and monitors, don't come over and try petting or stroking me, I'm liable to bite your damn hand off Just pretend all that stuff isn't there.

Somehow I wouldn't have that impulse if I met ya either in the hospital room or the street, Shaky. Ya kinda remind me of a caged pit bull at times with the animation and ferocity of your stories. Or a retired prizefighter. You were downright scary the first time I met ya! Just kidding, bro!

[lostatsea]

Cardoc and I will be getting the Nicoderm patch to help aid in quitting. That is how I quit last time. I will be qutting really soon as in like this weekend. Thanks for the support.

Good luck guys!

It's kind of like raising kids I suppose. . I didn't like being smooshed, you know, when adults grab two handfuls of cheeks and twist and utter nonsense like "my Stevie moo" . Hell i didn't like being touched all that much to begin with and Iliked being mauled even less.

I didn't like being smooshed either. My Aunt Dotty used to put both hands near your face, grab your cheeks and squeeze them whenever she came to visit, she terrorized us with that!

[Doublerunner]

Hey this is from my buddy. He has 3 lumps on his back and when he heard of this then this is why he thinks he may have cancer

If you are a Former Marine, or know one that served aboard Camp Lejeaune from the mid 60's through the 80's There are major health issues caused by the drinking water aboard the base. Cancer. Google it. Pass the word. 67 confirmed cases of male breast cancer caused Mastectomies. Kidney, Pancreas, and liver are all related. I am going through the paperwork process to have some lumps looked at now. Semper Fi!

I think any one that served there in the corps should get themselves checked out for this. If you do a google search there is lots of info out there about this. What a shame

[DarkSkies]

Thanks for posting that, Doublerunner.



Candle for Cancer - sent in by Surfstix, thanks.


> Let's all Pray that within our life time THEY will find that cure!
>
>
> In memory of our moms, dads, brothers and sisters, children,
> friends and loved ones of whom there are so many and those
> fighting cancer. For all the friends, family, loved ones, and
> those we don't even know
>
>
>
> Friday is world cancer day - I'd appreciate it if you will
> forward this request
>
>
> 93% won't forward
>
> A small request.. Just one line.
>
> Dear God, I pray for a cure for cancer. Amen
>
>
>
> All you are asked to do is keep this circulating, even if it's
> only to one more person.
> In memory of anyone you know who has been struck down by cancer
> or is still living with it.
>
> A Candle Loses Nothing by Lighting Another Candle..
>
> Please Keep This Candle Going >
>
>
>
> Let's all Pray that within our life time THEY will find that cure!
>
>
> In memory of our moms, dads, brothers and sisters, children,
> friends and loved ones of whom there are so many and those
> fighting cancer. For all the friends, family, loved ones, and
> those we don't even know
>

[rip316]

Today was my 6th day without a smoke. Cardoc is right there with me. My daughter is very proud of me because I don't smell like an ashtray.

[DarkSkies]

Cancers like pancreatic cancer, spine cancer, and in some cases bone cancer, are probably to a large extent not curable. From what I've seen in life, anyone getting these types most often dies, albeit at different times.

The main point I'm trying to make here is that not all cancer is curable, no matter how much we hope and pray.

The best thing I have learned is that it's never too early to prepare for the possibility of death if you have a cancer diagnosis.

**Death is the final destination for us all..... but on the way there, there is nothing wrong with taking charge and celebrating our life, mending the broken fences of failed relationships and hurt feelings, and in general making peace with those we are close to.

Each and every person in this world has in some way been touched by cancer, and I'm sure some of you have some painful stories to tell.

I don't have to remind any fishermen out there that we have lost quite a few of our fishing brothers to cancer, one of the most recent being Gary Hull, the well-known maker of Gary2 plugs, who succumbed to complications from prostate cancer last year. RIP, Gary.

1. From a patients perspective, I'm not dead yet, stop acting like you're at a funeral or a wake.

2. If I need help and you're a good friend I'll probably ask for it.

3. Don't feed me some bs like "if I need anything call" if you don't mean it.

4. As I said before i always hated hearing the words "sorry to hear that". I would normally lead the conversation in the direction i wanted it to go. Much easier on the friends and family members. If i heard those words my response was usually, "if you're not laughing within the next few minutes I'm hanging up the phone". Trust me i had them laughing.

5. If you normally call once a week, keep it up. I suppose most people with family and friends get a hell of a lot more calls when they're sick. After awhile they get tired of answering the same questions over and over.

6. As a friend I believe it's your job to bring a little normalcy back to my life. I know I'm sick. The reason i know this is because i have a team of doctors, nurses, chemists and nuclear physicists telling me I'm sick and their treatments are probably bringing me as close to death as they can without killing me.

7. If I don't feel like talking I won't and if I do feel like talking, talk about whatever it is we talked about before, fishing, hunting, sports, women, work

Thanks for sharing those words of wisdom, Steve.

1. As far as the help, i've been let down in the past.
2. I seldom ask anyone for help, so if you tell me you'll be there, don't be shining me on. A few acquaintances offered help, I called on one or two and they were there when i needed them.

I'm the same way. It's very hard for me to ask. As a result, I usually don't ask, even when I need help.

Rich this is a great thread. I am no expert but just want to offer this. We can make a difference.Each of us can make a difference no matter how big or small.

Thanks for the positivity, and all your efforts, Doublerunner. Hope things are better for you now.

I figure most people go through the same things.

1. There's the what would i do if they told me I had X amount of time to live thinking.

2. When the diagnosis comes in all those things you may have said So you go through a stage of feeling sorry for yourself, woe is me, what did i do to deserve this, I'm not ready to die etc.

3. You spend some sleepless nights, while getting prepped for a battery of tests. Still haven't told a sole other than my brother and sister in law. Want all the facts first.
4. Somewhere in the middle of all of this, I started seeing the humor in it. I suppose it's like public speaking where you imagine your audience naked. Laughing is easy. I could laugh all day without getting tired. Worrying and crying is stressful.
Choice is easy for me, find a way to keep laughing.

5. You start getting calls and e-mails, people telling you how brave you are and what courage you have. Perhaps by definition, but I saw nothing courageous in my actions. I didn't choose to have cancer. It's not like running into a burning building to save someone.

6. The humor is something else. I managed to find the lighter side in all my tests treatments and surgeries and rather than avoid the subject, i just turned it into a comedy routine. all i needed was an audience.

cheers
steve

I took some of Doublerunner's and Shaky/Steve's comments, and put them in bullet points.
There is some incredible wisdom here and I wanted to re-visit it.

The thing that I have noticed is that when someone gets cancer, a lot of their friends and acquaintances tend to avoid the subject, or avoid them.
This isn't being callous or cruel.....many folks simply don't know what to say, and feel their words of support may fall short, or feel inadequate.
That's completely normal, but it's not helpful to the person who has cancer.

**If you do know someone who is going through this....some thoughts....per the comments above...
1. Celebrate life.....with them, and get together to savor every last moment....before it's too late...
2. Laughter...the best medicine...it has gotten me through the worst of times....and it can help, in situations like this, where one might be uncomfortable with the possibilities of death and dying....try your best to help that person laugh....you won't regret it.....

[plugcrazy]

great thread. My uncle had prostate cancer and survived. I got checked in December. It was a little weird having something up your butt, but hey they knock you out anyway. Had good results. Next test in 5 years. For anyone on the fence about it I say go and do it.