February 4, 2009

Usefulness

We hear a lot in meetings that a grateful alcoholic doesn't get drunk.
What I have found, though, reaches far beyond feeling grateful,
and that is feeling useful.
I believe that when I am grateful, It is usually for what I have been given.
However, when I am useful, it is for what I am able to give.
If nothing else, the program of AA has offered me the ability to be useful.
And for that, I am eternally grateful.


Thought to Ponder....

To be sensitive is to feel the thoughts and hearts of others
as only you would want yours felt.



This goes with the AA tradition "We keep what we have by giving it away", a great way to move forward in sobriety. Wallowing in alcoholism and isolating ourselves is not a good direction. The program teaches us that isolation of any kind is not a good thing. I know I like to fish alone, and that's ok, as long as I don't neglect my family or friends by isolating myself.

I talked to a friend the other night who is addicted to many things. He straightened himself out, but still goes gambling. He justified this over and over by explaining his gambling system. If he didn't think it might become a problem, why would he need to justify it to me, or anyone? He also described the isolation aspect, and that anyone who he knew who was aa serious gambler gambled alone. He does that too, so I thought it was interesting that he had all these rationalizations.

If you wanna gamble, go for it. It is what it is. Knowiung you have a compulsive personality and still putting yourself in risky situations? Only you can answer whether that's good or bad for your recovery.

Usefulness, for me, helps me to break out of the shell of isolation and reach out to help others. In doing so, I help and learn about myself. And that feels good.