A little late on the AA daily quote, sorry.





December 13, 2008

A New Dimension

In the late stages of our drinking, the will to resist has fled.
Yet when we admit complete defeat
and when we become entirely ready to try AA principles,
our obsession leaves us and we enter a new dimension --
freedom under God as we understand Him.





I resisted the God thing for so many years, even though I grew up with God and the church in my life, I felt God had abandoned me. Through my dysfunctional eyes I saw the church as money grubbing dogma, and an organization that in some instances couldn't control the pedophelia.

This is God? I kept asking myself, what a frikkin bunch of hyppocrates!

In the beginning of my recovery, I was exposed to some family that are Christians. This allowed my cynical nature further chances to question God. The way I understand Christian beliefs, you will not be saved unlss you follow specific steps. What about the Muslims, Jews, Buddhists, and the Indian tribes of the world that worship God according to their different beliefs, none of which is acceptable to Christian beliefs?

I gradually realized that by looking for reasons why religiojn, or some religions, seemed to be hypocritical, I was pushing away the comcept of spirituality. In the last 20 years, I have met some people with deep spiritual convictions. Some of them in the outside world, some of them in the program, some of them on this site, who send me e-mails with religious themes.

At one time I would have resisited this, and still questioned it. I got a thrill of quizzing family who were Christians about why the other religions were not good enough, as they tried to sit across the table and get me to accept Jesus Christ. I now realize that I don't have to agree with all the religious beliefs of a person to see their things from their eyes, and try harder to do that.

Thanks to all the people who send me religious stuff, even though I might argue with you sometimes. I'm still not as spiritual as I feel I should be, but I'm tryin.

I think the best thing about AA/Na and the concept of God is their principle:

"Freedom under God as we understand him."

That works for me.