So last night, feeling particularly down on myself, I found myself in Newark, on the way to Walmart after work at 12am.....

I passed by the train station. There was a homeless guy sitting on the ground, a wheelchair beside him.....
There's nothing unusual about that.....lots of homeless people in Newark...I see them all the time.....What made me stop and turn around was I asked myself why he wasn't in his wheelchair, and sitting on the ground instead.....

So I circled around, and passed by again....pulling up to him...
"Hey buddy how ya doing? Just wondered why you weren't sitting in your chair? Do you need some help getting back in?"

Him- "No man, I just needed some air...I'm ok, all good."

Me- "Just wondering why you're not in the shelter...If you want I can give you a ride there"

Him - "No I just got a lot of things on my mind right now. I don't want to stay there..I'm good, thanks for offering."

I noticed both of his feet had been cut off at the calves......often an extreme complication of diabetes, and a hard life......once they cut your feet off.....it's a slow downhill slide for many.....

I saw the bottoms of his stubs, as he was rubbing them..
He was a black man, about my age.....but living on the street had made him look much older...

As I looked at him....I was thinking about my circumstances...and a lot of us...and how close we could be to being homeless....if just a few things didn't go our way....it's not really that hard to imagine how any one of us could be a victim of circumstances...with a few bad obstacles mounting up before us....

So I got out of the car, slipped him some $$...he said thanks, and I intended to get back in the car and on my way.....

However, as I approached him I got whiff of a powerful stench...urine and feces.....it was really strong and everything about him reeked......
I thought of giving him a blanket I had in the trunk, but his blankets were actually better, though urine and feces soaked......

I realized, in the big picture, there was not much more that I could do, than give this guy some money to buy a meal, and move on....this is a cold harsh realization, but one that we must face, if we are to live our lives.....

Interfering in the lives of others, if they don't want help....is often met with resistance or hostility.....and that must be respected...
As I was eye to eye level with him, I could see that he wasn't drunk...or high....he was clear and lucid.....it seemed he definitely could have been the "victim of circumstances" I mentioned earlier....

With 2 feet cut off, his life must have been pretty tough....
And here I am, whining about my life, and feeling sorry for myself?