Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 21 to 37 of 37

Thread: Why is the water brown in Raritan Bay?

  1. #21
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    NJ
    Posts
    781

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by bababooey View Post
    I think I can answer that. It's a little involved so work with me.
    (I hope you guys don't think this is racist as I have a chinese girlfriend on the side, and we employ a chinese gardener who does very good work) On monty's last trip to china he aggravated a lot of chinese people. They had been wiping their du-pa's with their hands for centuries. Then monty comes along and asks for toilet paper. All of a sudden the CEO of the company had a secretary he was banging. Since she was banging him she thought she deserved the same priveleges monty did. so she demanded toilet paper as well. He gave her some but stockpiled it in the executive washroom in his office (i stole this from seinfeld) He swore her to secrecy about the toilet paper. To keep names straight, let's call her Lin.

    Even though Lin was banging the CEO, her heart belonged to a worker on the factory floor named Hu-Chen. He was a handsome fella and stole her heart. Their romance was forbidden in Chinese custom because her parents wanted her to marry someone above her status. However she couldn't marry her boss because he was already married. So she was stuck in a culture wormhole. She did mention to her true live Hu-Chen that monty was being given some toilet paper, and she as well. She tried to sneak some in to him and his friends but it caused a grave uproar in the factory. Pretty soon all the workers heard about the luxury of using toilet paper to clean their rectums to sparkling shiny condition. They all wanted some. When the bosses found out, they calculated it would cost the factory an extra $1.07 per month per worker if they were to supply them with toilet paper. This was unacceptable as it would cut into the profit margin.

    Since it is important in Chinese culture to save face and avoid confrontation,. the bosses could not confront monty or his superiors over this grave indiscretion. instead, they knew china is a country of 8 billion people. They found out monty lived in nj and liked to fish the bays. I don't know if monty fishes the raritan bay exclusively or fishes the barnegat bay as well,. so lets use the raritan bay as an example. The bosses told all their relatives that every time someone visited new jersey, it would be a sign of respect to monty if they would go down to the shoreline and poop in the raritan bay. This only seemed to happen in the summer because the chinese embassy extended so many visas and summer season was the most visas. The town authorities thought it was algae or bunker crap but they didn't want to let the real reason get out - that for some reason an untold # of asian tourists were coming down to the bay and pooping in the water.

    This went on for the whole summer of 2013 and part of 2014 before some fishermen reported it and the authorities were alerted. The rogue chinese tourists were rounded up and sent back to china post haste. To this day whenever it gets over 75 degrees the accumulated waste comes out from the back creeks and turns the water there brown.

    That's my story and I'm sticking to it!
    Chinese crap protocol and saltwater carp. Crazy stuff keep em coming.

  2. #22
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Deliverance River, NJ
    Posts
    2,732

    Default

    Thanks fellas. Glad you liked it. the inspiration just came to me as I was reading Monty's China trips and his disgusting daily stories.

    The way things are in China that story could probably almost be true. Rofl

  3. #23
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    NY
    Posts
    261

    Default

    haha this is hilarious! Really enjoyed that thanks.

  4. #24
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Deliverance River, NJ
    Posts
    2,732

    Default

    Maybe you could bring this the next time you go to china.

  5. #25
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    NJ
    Posts
    3,725

    Default

    omg that is so creepy and scary! So monty he's right you should bring them as gifts to the Chinese people. Should be a hit!

  6. #26
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    1,486

    Default

    The best poop of your life. Only could you see something like this at stripers and anglers. lmao

  7. #27
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Posts
    1,541

    Default

    Read this today
    The Lower Raritan Watershed Partnership, NY/NJ Baykeeper and Raritan Riverkeeper Bill Schultz were out on the Raritan River / Raritan Bay yesterday (8/1/2016) to capture water samples for pathogens testing after all the rain.

    We just got the test results back: All sites in South Amboy and Perth Amboy came back positive for bacteria.

    The Perth Amboy sites were off the charts. To be considered swimmable the test must come back at 35 MPN/100mls or less.

    Rt. 35 Bridge was 3,448 MPN/100MLS

    The 2nd Street and the Yacht Club sites were each in the 400s.

    We had much better/safer results during the drought! Please stay out of the waters!

  8. #28
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Location
    Ocean County,NJ
    Posts
    4,619

    Default

    Sewage
    Cheaper for NY to pump raw than treat during periods of heavy rain been going on for over 40 years that I can remember

    Pay attention to what history has taught us or be prepared to relive it again

  9. #29
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    NJ
    Posts
    2,439

    Default

    They could also have a combination of high water temperatures and people being a little lax this time of year.
    I agree with fin Chaser about the sewage, but people and their littering, and throwing fish carcasses in the water and marinas doesn't help the situation. They just closed two beaches in the Beachwood area down due to high bacterial content.
    http://www.nj.com/ocean/index.ssf/20...lantic_article

  10. #30
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Deliverance River, NJ
    Posts
    2,732

    Default

    I have heard so many people talk about Raritan Bay this year that it blows my mind. That bay runs water from sewer systems when it rains a lot. I don't know how you guys could eat fish out of there. You all deserve the Mad pooper!
    http://denver.cbslocal.com/2017/09/1...gs-mad-pooper/

  11. #31
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Jersey
    Posts
    1,909

    Default

    Rb has the brownest water I have ever seen.

  12. #32
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    NJ
    Posts
    3,075

    Default

    Finally have the scientific answer. Raritan bay water cleaned up because some of the poopers were pooping on running tracks!

  13. #33
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    950

    Default

    Gross!

  14. #34
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    New Jersey
    Posts
    1,956

    Default

    Should read some of the comments and opinions left after the article. "**it and run" my favorite.

  15. #35
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    LI
    Posts
    561

    Default

    roflmao that guy can't ever live this down. He's a sick puppy.

  16. #36
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Deliverance River, NJ
    Posts
    2,732

    Default

    Belmar is now running neck and neck to RB with the poop stories. Yikes!
    http://www.nj.com/monmouth/index.ssf...nto_water.html

  17. #37
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    NJ
    Posts
    3,725

    Default

    This thread is so gross and funny at the same time, awesome!

Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •