Dear Santa please help

[storminsteve]

Dear Santa, a lot of guys where I fish are talking about the fat lady. They say she sings or something like that. I wonder if you have any pull about bringing people gifts like this?

First of all, I don't like fat chicks. They roll down the street when they walk, and they smell.
They are also very big, and I'm afraid they might beat me up.
Most of all, if you bring any fat ladies to where I am fishing, the singing will scare the fish and they will go away.
So please don't bring me or any of the guys I fish with any fat ladys for Christmas.
Please bring us some hot bikini chicks to we can walk on the beach and pretend it's summer, back when the stripers were jumping out of the water after the bunker and mullet.
I want to catch one more striper before the end of the year, and I don't want any fat lady running in the water and scaring the little bass.

Signed,
Your pal,
Steve

PS. please bring my wife some chocolate with Valium for when she has PMS, 1 or 2 boxes should do the trick.
Your pal, Steve