Life, Death.... and Your Thoughts on Everything in Between.....

[DarkSkies]

I have already made my choices I want to be cremated and my ashes spread along my favorite stretch of beach my wife and children will be throwing my last cast I don't want to be buried and have this elaborate funeral that costs a ton of money,I would rather have that money spent on the living.

I agree, this is what I am doing as well.
"Dead is Dead"....is something Pebbles' father used to say......I believe when we die, our soul departs from us....hopefully going to Heaven, or another plane of existence, if that's what you believe.....what's left....our lifeless body....seems to have the most significance to the relatives and loved ones we leave behind....but if you really think about it...is just a pile of flesh and bones that will eventually turn to dust.........







Thought for today....
"Squeezing all the juice out of life, that it has to offer"


I mentioned this to someone the other day, because lately I have a different perspective on life....knowing that it can be snatched from us, on the turn of a dime.....I think of all the years I have been out there fishing at night....sometimes in hazardous conditions...how many times I fell and smashed the back of my head on some rocks, or fell down an embankment somewhere, fishing colder waters than I should, on a kayak....and all the close calls I have had.......

Any one of those, could have been the end of my life, or the wrong turn that I did not recover from....yet I'm still here.....
So why just live life....if not to to the fullest?

I think part of that, for many of us, is we have responsibilities, committments, to others....we sometimes get stuck in a rut....we have a job that pays the bills, and we sometimes settle for something that works....we can't always chase our dreams, every day......when we have family and life committments......this is true.......survival and bills should be a big part of life's responsibilites......

But how big a part?

What I'm suggesting here....particularly for those of us who get caught in that Mid-Winter depression, like I sometimes do....is to use that time to look at our lives.....and ask yourselves, if there are any small changes you can make that may help you on a path...to achieve at least some of your dreams?.....one day at a time.......

[Monty]

Any one of those, could have been the end of my life, or the wrong turn that I did not recover from....yet I'm still here.....
So why just live life....if not to to the fullest?

I think part of that, for many of us, is we have responsibilities, committments, to others....we sometimes get stuck in a rut....we have a job that pays the bills, and we sometimes settle for something that works....we can't always chase our dreams, every day......when we have family and life committments......this is true.......survival and bills should be a big part of life's responsibilites......

But how big a part?

I think balance is essential

1. family
2. self
3. work

Be careful with work, it supports family.
And be careful with self, because we need to be in a "good frame of mind" for family and work.

Its not easy, no one is perfect, likely not even close to perfect.
Give each day a 100%.
And when doing things for your self, enjoy it. And if going out on rocks is your thing, you would be nuts not doing it, just be smart.

[DarkSkies]

I think balance is essential

Its not easy, no one is perfect, likely not even close to perfect.
Give each day a 100%.
And when doing things for your self, enjoy it.

Good advice, Monty.

Pebbles and I visited the cemetery last week. That day would have been her Dad's 80th birthday. It was sad, but I'm glad we went.
I was struck by the number of young people who were buried there....some in their teens, and others in their mid-20's. We were walkinig among the graves trying to find another relative who was buried there, and the young people, the laments of family, and the glowing tributes on the headstones, were things I couldn't help noticing........

Took some pics...will try to post some of the most compelling ones (without identifying info) when I get a chance.....it really hit home, how much death can affect us and the ones we leave behind.......

A phrase..."Life is for the living" comes to mind....and another reminder that it's never too late, to try to live the live you want to live......
...or to tell someone who is still living, how much they mean to you...and try to bring a smile to their day....

[DarkSkies]

Took some pics...will try to post some of the most compelling ones (without identifying info) when I get a chance.....it really hit home, how much death can affect us and the ones we leave behind.......

A phrase..."Life is for the living" comes to mind....and another reminder that it's never too late, to try to live the live you want to live......
...or to tell someone who is still living, how much they mean to you...and try to bring a smile to their day....

I'm a little behind, trying to process those pics, hopefully I can get one or 2 up in the next few days.
Remember praying for the sick is an honorable thing...visiting them before they are sick, or dying, is even more rewarding...

[stripercrazy]

We were walkinig among the graves trying to find another relative who was buried there, and the young people, the laments of family, and the glowing tributes on the headstones, were things I couldn't help noticing........

I read what you said here and it reminded me of the way we think about death. Someone e-mailed me this when my uncle died, RIP Uncle Al.

No farewell words were spoken, no time to say good-bye. You were gone before I knew it and only God knows why.
My heart still aches in sadness and secret tears still flow, what it meant to lose you, no one will ever know.

I thought that I would miss you so, and never find my way.
And then I heard the angel say "he's with you every day."
"The sun, the moon, the wind, the stars, will forever be around,
reminding you of the love you shared, and the peace he's finally found."

Do not stand at my grave and weep, I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am in a thousand winds that blow, I am the softly falling snow.
I am the gentle showers of rain, I am the fields of ripening grain.
I am in the morning hush, I am in the graceful rush.
Of beautiful birds in circling flight, I am a star shining in the night.
I am in the flowers that bloom, I am in a quiet room.
I am in the birds that sing, I am in each lovely thing.
Do not stand at my grave and cry, I am not there. I did not die !
( By Mary Frye )

[DarkSkies]

^ Nice poem stripercrazy, thanks for sharing that.

Took some pics...will try to post some of the most compelling ones (without identifying info) when I get a chance.....it really hit home, how much death can affect us and the ones we leave behind.......
A phrase..."Life is for the living" comes to mind....and another reminder that it's never too late, to try to live the live you want to live......
...or to tell someone who is still living, how much they mean to you...and try to bring a smile to their day....

Some of the pics........





Ebbtide......

[DarkSkies]

Another one.....
Lived your life...Brave and True...

[DarkSkies]

Spent a few hours at the hospital last night. The sister of someone I have known for 20 years is in bad shape, She has pneumonia, her lungs are filling up with fluid. She's only 61 which isn't that old. I saw her 5 years ago and she was in relatively good shape.

What I realized last night when I visited is over the years she has developed schizophrenia, and recently dementia. I thought I knew a lot about mental illness. Unfortunately I saw her so infrequently that I didn't pick up on the schizophrenia. 6 years ago she had a job working at the airport and was fairly functional. Now her life has deteriorated so much that if she recovers she will spend the rest of her life in a nursing home.













Several things occurred to me.........

1. When we are healthy life is good. When our health fails, many people stop caring..... or stop seeming to care.

2. Yes, it does take some effort to communicate or visit with someone who is sick, but wouldn't we want the same courtesy if we were sick? We are not all young, and our health is guaranteed to fail at some point.......
I feel that some of us put little effort into life or relationships, until it is too late. I have been guilty of that as well.

3. The point to make here, is that if someone we know starts deteriorating, and eventually dies, that relationship we had with them, before they die, is entirely up to us......
Expressing regret at not having visited them, after they die.......is pointless......and part of our human flaws.....IMO

4. The selfishness of many folks in this world becomes apparent to me daily.....I can smell a selfish user a mile away because of problems in my own dysfunctional family.....and will be making a conscious effort to divest myself from anyone in my life who I consider selfish, or a "user"....for my own peace of mind......
This means continuing to engage in whatever battles are necessary with the clueless manipulators who continue to claim there is nothing wrong with our present fisheries.... as a means to divert the truth and push their own selfish agenda.

5. Get the hell out there....and make that effort.........you and they will feel blessed for the contact......Make no mistake about it...human contact has healing powers...but if you can't help someone....the contact will offer needed comfort and peace of mind.....

Remember....the person you are feeling (or should feel) sorry for....may one day be you.

I hope these words reached someone who may not have been living up to their potential in helping someone out in their lives who desperately needs it......
Thanks for reading....

[DarkSkies]

Back in the hospital again last night.....the person we have been worried about flat-lined yesterday, and was revived with the paddles. Because of this and other deterioration, her kidneys were damaged, and she's now on dialysis and life support. She's in a medically induced coma, and it's pretty tough to be there and watch.

I know this is a grim post, but I make these posts to remind us all.....that any of our lives could turn for the worse, in an instant...
There are many things we take for granted....and relationships as well....we mistakenly assume that those we have neglected in our busy lives...will be around for "at least a few more years"...

Any relationships, if we have let them lapse, we assume we can repair them....that there is enough time....
I know I have been very guilty of that in the past....so please don't think I'm judging anyone.....
But I am making the point......in hopes of motivating some of us....to
Make that call...
Make that visit...
Reach out to someone in your life...that you may have lost touch with....

You can't reach out and touch them, when they are dead....
Thanks for reading.....

[baitstealer]

Sorry for your friend dark skies. Thoughts and prayers for her recovery.

[seamonkey]

My uncle is 81 and I haven't spoken to him too much lately. You know the drill - life, job, kids, honey do list, everything gets in the way. Today I called him to see how he was doing. We talked for awhile and he told me about some of his cool war stories. I will be visiting him for Thanksgiving but it was nice to get in touch. Thanks for the push, DS. T&P for your friend.

[surfstix1963]

Thoughts and prayers for your friend Rich.

[DarkSkies]

Thanks for the kind words, people. Please don't feel sorry for me or my life.....I have been seeing a lot of this sadness and going through tough times lately.....

However.....I know folks right now whose lives are much worse than mine....with no hope of things getting better....and hence the reason for me sharing these posts with you.....to try to get some of us, including me, to look at our busy lives, and see if we can find some time for those who may have meant something to us, in the past.....or we had relationships with, and are now estranged.....

Because Death.....is the final chapter.....and once that threshhold is crossed....there is no turning back the clock, or room for regrets for what we did or didn't do....






If you are religious you might believe that Death is a new beginning....my Faith is not as strong as that of some others I know....and I still struggle with this...my wavering about the existence of an Afterlife and Eternal Salvation......I'm trying to share my experiences, and feelings with the folks out there...no matter how uncomfortable they may be.....in hopes of encouraging us all, to perhaps rekindle or mend some relationships that we have let lapse.....

Seamonkey I'm glad I was a "push" for you.....that's kind of what I'm getting at here.....
Keeping in mind that my own behavior in relationships with others, has not been the best.....
I'm hoping that some here...can learn from my mistakes......and will have less regrets than I do......

As an update, yesterday they said her condition has stabilized a bit......so there is hope.....

Remember that folks....sometimes even when there is not much hope.....
A friend by your side.....can offer Comfort.....entirely free but more valuable than all the riches in the world......knowing that someone else out there....cares enough to support you in your time of need....

So, as always....thanks for reading......and the kind thoughts..

[ledhead36]

Hang in there Rich. Lifes got the ups and downs but we got your back bud. Stop by any time. You know where to find us.

[ledhead36]

Found something to cheer you up, bud. I remember your punk rock and hardcore stories of back in the old days when you had some balls instead of being the world diplomat you are today.
Hope you like it

[DarkSkies]

Thanks led.........I might have mentioned Flipper to ya one time when we were discussing old school hardcore....Flipper was an acquired taste.....some hated them...all the more reason for me to check them out....

One cold Winter I wanted to see Flipper in Philly...SharkHart's home town...
It was cold....no one wanted to go with me....they were playing in a small venue that has since closed down....it took me forever to find the place....but I had a good time......I'm the same way with fishing....over the years asking friends if they wanted to fish when it was uncomfortable, cold, or raining out there....too many "sorry the weather's not cool I don't want to go".... excuses....

This led to me habitually doing things by myself and making each trip an adventure......something that I'm comfortable with....
Death is never a comfortable subject for most of us......hence the reason for me talking about it here....trying to help some of us who are dealing with these very issues and challenges.....





I do appreciate the words, thoughts, music...etc...that's what makes you all such great people....thanks.

[surfstix1963]

Death is never easy to deal with, my wife and I have lost a good man last night my Father in law passed away 2014 continues to beat us down but we just keep getting up and that is all you can do.

[buckethead]

So sorry surfstix. Thoughts and prayers for your father in law.

[surfstix1963]

Thank You..

[storminsteve]

Man thats gotta be tough. Prayers sent surfstix.